M – Maternity clothes

Before I had any children, and was trying to get pregnant, I would wistfully turn to the “Maternity” section of my NEXT catalogue and daydream about what I would wear if I were pregnant! Oh the irony! Because all I did when I was pregnant is flick through magazines daydreaming about the clothes I would be able to wear if I wasn’t pregnant.

 

Some shops used to do a “maternity” section – a lonely, forgotten rack of clothes, so inappropriately placed in the shop, if you blinked you’d miss them. Or so forgotten that when asking a shop assistant if they had a maternity section she’d look puzzled and shout over her shoulder “Marie, where’d you stck them maternity clothes?” And if you were lucky enough to find it, you would have the choice of a pack of two T-shirts – (one black, one white),a pair of black work wear trousers, an attempt at an “evening top”, one very unflattering dress and a pair of boot cut jeans. If you’re lucky there may be a nightie as well.

 

Now most high street shops, have opted to remove this rail, to make more room for mini skirts and skinny jeans and when you ask where the maternity section is they’ll say “we do it online”.

 

So, you shop online, guessing about what these unusual items with extra elastic and no fastenings will look like. You buy them, over the bump, under the bump, they’re all bloody uncomfortable. The only thing to wear whilst pregnant are floaty dresses and maternity leggings – in fact I think after discovering maternity leggings last time round I’m never going to buy a pair of normal leggings again. They are the most comfortable (and probably unflattering) piece of clothing ever! I recommend them to all you pregnant ladies… And non-pregnant ladies too – Go on treat yourself!

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